[NEWS] BANANO BOY Learns Krav Maga
Seriously, watch out.
The Daily Peel is bringing the Republic of BANANO urgent news: BANANO Boy is learning Krav Maga.
While the games maker is reportedly just starting this journey and has only mastered the palm strike, we feel certain that he will soon become so powerful that he will have to be legally classified as a deadly weapon.
We asked the famous games maker and JACKASS kicker if he is going to use his new skills for good or evil. Like an exemplary practitioner of the deadly art, he gracefully responded,
“I only use it if someone is trying to hurt me. If you tryin to kill me, I sure as hell will beat your ass”
The Daily Peel was on site and reported that as early as 7 minutes later, Banano Boy was seen threatening Sivulla with an unidentified Krav Maga move.
So how does one person possess so much ass-beating ability? Banano Boy says he “eats tons of bacon. Mostly 5 pieces a day.” While this is just speculation, we suspect this is where he is generating a majority of his power.
IF YOU SEE THIS BOY [pictured], stay calm. He is not an immediate threat. He is normally friendly, approachable, and a good monkey. All we have to say is...
Don’t mess with him.