I shudder as I write this.
The Jungle was truly disturbing last weekend while images of an impossibly buff Pokémon circulated the chats. The image first appeared on one of our BANGO cards for R.I.P. Pokécord BANGO, and soon infected the Jungles of BANANO.
AresStormRunner was the first to change their identity, and it soon spread to many other monkeys changing their Discord names, as well as their profile pictures, to show support for a horrifying cause: torchic terrorism.
Look into the eyes of this swole torchic. This soulless, too-shredded creature. Birds are not meant to have abs like this. This abomination doesn’t have arms but it has shoulder pads? I hate it.
Even some of BANANO’s moderators supported this heinous uprising.
A pie was brought into this. I do not approve.
A swole torchic emoji was created. Horrible.
There is simply no good reason for a torchic to be this swole.
Soon, the image of the disgusting bird beast had overtaken the entire BANANO server, and a new world order was being formed before our eyes. A new way of life... A life of purposeless poultry buffness.
I wouldn’t wish this on my worst enemy.
We can not explain this.
The Daily Peel advises all monkeys to brace themselves for next year’s July 12. Casualties are to be expected.
Don’t @ me.